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Tuesday, March 8, 2011

A snow-cone kind of day.



We've been enjoying all the warmer weather down our way. So much in fact that Little Man and I decided it was a perfect day to get a snow-cone and enjoy time together in the backyard. I had my favorite flavor, pina colada and Little Man enjoyed a strawberry cone with extra juice.







Despite the warmer temps, it's still a bit early to pull out the kiddie pool. Little Man was a little frustrated with mommy about that, but when we pulled out his tractor--all was well again.















Here lately I have been weighed down (physically and emotionally) by work, home and church commitments...both my husband and I have. As many of you know, my hubby is (practically speaking) working two jobs these days...a full-time attorney and serving as a Bishop for our church. Both of which require him to work very long hours during the week and on Sundays--and unfortunately, a great deal of time is spent away from Little Man and myself. I honestly feel for him. I know he is dealing with a lot right now and many days, he feels torn because these commitments pull him away from his family. But we take great comfort in the fact that our family has and continues to be blessed for his service to the Lord and the others he is helping.

I've been thinking long and hard lately how life seems to be getting busier and busier and as a result, we are having to work harder and harder to find quality time together as families. The simpler days I knew and enjoyed in my childhood seem so far away. Alas though....this technology age that we now live in is the new way of living. We as a society are now connected more than ever via the internet, cell phones, satellite tv and our global economy. We are ever busy as we try our best to balance work, home, church and the endless amount of extracurricular activities out there. All of which can be good and rewarding, yet they can also crowd our days with busyness and stress.

My own family has felt this busyness and stress here lately. In January, I had a wonderful professional opportunity that literally just fell into my lap--quite frankly, it seemed too good to pass up. So I accepted it and prayed that I would be able to balance it all. Having the two incomes again was nice, the stimulation I felt by working in my field again was a refreshing change-- and then, having affordable health insurance once again, I couldn't complain--at least in the beginning that is. Unfortunately the euphoria of my new job didn't last long. All too soon, the lengthy travel required, long work hours and some other unexpected stressors proved to be too much for me and my loved ones. Like many of you I'm sure, my hubby and I do not have extended family that live nearby, so it makes life sometimes challenging not having help when we need it--and boy did we need it with me going back to work full-time outside the home. Admittedly, I had tremendous guilt when I had to be away from my family when traveling for work. I hated knowing that my most prized possession, my little man, had to stay in child care until 6pm at night due to my long work hours. And yet, I had even further guilt knowing that my husband (who is already stretched too thin) had to also begin helping me get little man to school when I was out of town or rush over to pick him up when I had to work late. Just wasn't making for a healthy situation for us.

I was reminded during these past 2 months that there is a time and season for everything and for me, it is most definitely not the best time or season for me to be back in a stressful career. And sadly, I think the one who was suffering the most was Little Man. Prior to me taking this new job, he had never once bit his nails, now he has become a nail biter. We also noticed him to begin to act out more than usual and pull away from me emotionally. All signs that the stress was getting to my sweet little boy. So, after much discussion between the hubby and me and some praying, I decided it best I tender my resignation.

My hubby and son have told me that they are happy to have the "old me" back. The "not-so-stressed" mama who now will have time again to focus on them and our home.

Life is too short and I don't want to look back at this stage of my life with regret---wishing that I had stayed home with my son a bit longer before going back to work. Or wishing that I would have stayed home to help my husband more as he works so hard to provide for us as well as take care of our church family. Which leads me to this great gem of a quote from President Thomas S. Monson that I pondered as I was making my decision:

"Near the end of his life, one father looked back on how he had spent his time on earth. An acclaimed, respected author of numerous scholarly works, he said, ‘I wish I had written one less book and taken my children fishing more often.’ Time passes quickly. Many parents say that it seems like yesterday that their children were born. Now those children are grown, perhaps with children of their own. ‘Where did the years go?’ they ask....We cannot call back time that is past, we cannot stop time that now is, and we cannot experience the future in our present state. Time is a gift, a treasure not to be put aside for the future but to be used wisely in the present.”

I am grateful for these past 60 days and for the perspective they have provided me in my journey as a wife and mother. Life is never easy nor are the decisions we are faced with. But I am continually learning that as long as we keep our priorities straight, remember what is most important in this life and stay close to our father in heaven....there is no question, our lives can truly be sweeter and we can face whatever adversity comes our way with greater strength and peace of mind. And I must admit, now that I am no longer working outside the home, I am looking forward to getting back to my blogging and keeping up with all of you on a more regular basis. :-)

"Being a full time mother is one of the highest paid salaried jobs in my field, since the payment is pure love."
-Mildred B. Vermont





Many blessings my friends,

Jennifer

3 comments:

  1. Oh and I love your new blog look! It's beautiful!

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  2. Wow. That must have been a tough decision for you all! Good luck with everything! That little man of yours in precious!

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  3. How wonderful to see this blog again! Whew!

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